Coming in hot ON A TUESDAY! It’s 8:08pm, and I’ll admit that I’ve got my popcorn ready for the Bachelor in Paradise Finale. I’m time stamping the start of this post so I know how distracted I got by the family group chat / melting brain cells simultaneously with trashy television and a Tuesday evening serving of Sauvignon Blanc.
SPOILER ALERT 🚨 This post includes commentary of BIP as I see it, so… in the off chance you actually watch the show, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Not gonna lie, this week’s lululemon upload had me thinking more than once… doppelgänger. Huh? Read on, I’ll show you.
5 Faves & a Dud: 9/17/19 Edition
Favorite #1: Close to Crossing Long Sleeve ($88) in Space Dye Camo White Silver Spoon
The stripes in the pattern plus the angled structure of the top combine to mean one thing: Katy wants it. This is one of those pieces that my finger FLEW to the “Add to Cart” button immediately upon seeing it.
Why? I love this criss cross look on me. How do I know that I love this look? Because I already own it, from Athleta, one or two winters ago.
While aesthetically similar, the main difference is the fabric. Lulu’s version is a tighter knit yet lighter cozy fabric, Rulu. Athleta’s version is SOFT AF, but also a far more weighty sweatshirt variety.
BIP Time check: 8:44p. Nicole walks away from Clay because he’s a normal person that doesn’t want to jump into an engagement after a few weeks. Boring. Chris and Katie cried, there’s a ring on it. Dylan & Hannah say some stuff to each other and now there’s a ring on it. I put the over/under at 9:12p when the Demi/Kristian stuff plays out on the beach before people start yelling and crying in an LA soundstage.
Favorite #2: Winter Warrior Parka ($448) in Dark Red
Lululemon done gone and gone from Tropic to Arctic REAL EFFING QUICK. But then back again, because not only do we have this beautiful red Miss Fluffleupagus, but there’s also a whole new run of swimwear this week. Hmmm.
On the heels of last week’s wool, we’ve got a gorgeous, yet expensive, winter jacket. The twin alarm went off again, because this parka looks like a Canada Goose sans shoulder patch. It’s even got those backpack straps built in for when it’s just TOO DAMN HOT.
9:15pm – Christian sucks. At least Jordan has comedic value. Bickering men? SO UNATTRACTIVE. Moments like this make me remember why I stopped watching for a few seasons.
9:26pm – I just polished off a chocolate bar, and Blake looks like he wants to hide under a rug right now.
Favorite #3: Another Mile Jacket ($228) in Honeycomb
9:55pm – And somehow after Blake gets raked over the coals, we’re now doing a gender reveal? Talk about going another mile in the filler department to get ourselves to 11pm.
The hood comes out, but it also looks like an extra layer of collar. HOW DOES THIS WORK? Probably not as complicated as I’m making it out to be. Zip it, Katy. Literally.
Favorite #4: Invigorate Bra ($52) in Sea Frost
Every time I look in my colored sports bra drawer (not to be confused with my black, white & gray sports bra drawer), I see a LOT of pink, coral, grapefruit, pop orange. Time to make like the weather and cool the vibe down a bit.
10:17pm – Katie looks amazing, Katie is crying, Katie is throwing Chris under the bus. BEEP BEEP Y’ALL.
Favorite #5: Sun Shelter Long Sleeve Rash Guard ($68) in Amalfi Blue
I’ve been waiting on more Amalfi Blue since that Scuba came out, and I *kind of* got what I wished for. We got a handful of new pieces in my SECOND favorite blue (b/c Jet Stream), but they are all geared toward water sports.
Still holding out for some Long/Updated Speed Shorts in this color, but I’ll start here by ogling the loosest rash guard I’ve ever seen.
Meet the Marshmallows
Honorable Mention aka But Wait There’s MORE
10:40p – Now that I’m picking through upload a bit more analytically, there’s even MORE than the primary colors that grabbed my attention. I don’t understand what the Chris & Katie thing was. Hannah & Dylan are fine.
- Free to Be Serene Bra in Wee Are From Space Nimbus Battleship/Mystic Iris
- Energy Bra *Long Line in Wee Are From Space Nimbus Battleship/Powdered Rose
- All Tied Up Tank in Cut Back Stripe Tempest Blue White
Call Wendy’s I Want a Frosty
The Invigorate Bra isn’t the only Sea Frost item that made its entrance, we’ve got a bunch of options:
- Seek Simplicity Tank Two Ways
- Energy Bra High Neck
- Free to Be Bra *Wild High Neck
- Free to Be Bra *Wild
- Hotty Hot Short II & Hotty Hot Short II Long
- Breeze By Muscle Tank II Squad
10:57p – Alrighty then, Peter is the new Bachelor. I can say it because Harrison said it, but I read it on Twitter a couple weeks ago when the damn algorithm thought that because a college friend of mine follows Reality Steve that I ought to see his tweets in my timeline.
NOT COOL, ALGORITHM. NOT COOL.
Speaking of algorithms, I took to the gram earlier this afternoon to show off the heartthrob Swiftly Tech Long Sleeve and the Now and Always Crossbody. Episode ? of the self-proclaimed Worst TV Show Ever 😊
11:04p – I quit. I’m tired. If you’ve read this far and don’t see the swimwear & self care recap… I’ll be back.
Night all! ZzZzZz…
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